My Life Is Better . . . No, Worse!
Well, I haven't exactly been the most prolific BHNer around, have I? I haven't quite managed to figure out how to maintain two presences on the Web, if you will, without either repeating myself or depriving my precious main-blog audience of my wit and insight. Alas. But here's something:
You know those moms who have to one-up you every time you say something positive? You know, like "My baby got her first tooth!" "Oh, mine has two!" or "My kid is potty trained during the day!" "Oh, mine is potty-trained at night, too!" And so on. Well, I've discovered that there's something even worse: The mom who has to one-down your every negative experience. You say, "My kid was up all night coughing and sneezing" and she shoots back with "Both my twins have been puking since yesterday morning!" How can you possibly counter that? Or you say, "There's a boy bothering my kid at school" and she says, "Someone bit my kid!" What is with these people?
You know those moms who have to one-up you every time you say something positive? You know, like "My baby got her first tooth!" "Oh, mine has two!" or "My kid is potty trained during the day!" "Oh, mine is potty-trained at night, too!" And so on. Well, I've discovered that there's something even worse: The mom who has to one-down your every negative experience. You say, "My kid was up all night coughing and sneezing" and she shoots back with "Both my twins have been puking since yesterday morning!" How can you possibly counter that? Or you say, "There's a boy bothering my kid at school" and she says, "Someone bit my kid!" What is with these people?
posted by Karen @ 3:28 PM
4 Comments:
At 3:52 PM,
landismom said…
Hmm, I'm afraid I'm finding the same difficulty (the two blogs, that is, not the one-downing--great phrase). I've sorta been feeling like this is where I post my 'cute kid' stories, rather than doing serious blogging (although what's more serious than cute kids?). I'm interested to see what other folks will say on this topic.
At 5:50 PM,
Tammy said…
Oh no! Now I'm worried that I might be one of those moms. I sometimes have a tendency to share my own tales of misery when I hear about another mom's woes, but it's solely in the spirit of commiseration, I swear.
In response to the other point you mentioned, that landismom replied to, I've sort of given this a bit of thought as it relates to my own blogging habits. I definitely tend to write more on my other site, but my posts here usually fall into two camps: ridiculously cute/goofy baby pictures, and heartfelt posts about my biggest parenting issues and worries, things that I wouldn't feel comfortable posting on my other site. I'm cool with the diametric nature of my posts, but it is funny now that I put it into words. Heh.
At 11:50 PM,
... said…
I think I've been guilty of the one-downing as well. And like doppelganger, I swear it's out of compassion not competition! Ooh but those one-uppers! I don't stand a chance. The mothers at Finn's school are a priveleged lot. They drive VWs and their children are enrolled something like 6 different dance classes a day and they are learning Mandarin in their spare time.
Finn and I go for bike rides or to the pool. She dropped out of Drama Kids to take Wizarding - leave it to Finn to find a Wizarding class. Sure doesn't leave me much to brag about.
My tactic is to avoid the nasty ladies standing in the playground. This has worked well for me for a good 30 years.
At 7:59 AM,
Karen said…
There's a distinction between commiserating and one-downing. I too am likely to say to a friend who has just told me her tale of woe, "Oh, poor you! My kids are sick too, so I know how exhausted you are!" But I'm talking about the moms whose replies are total conversation-stoppers: "One of your kids puked last night? Count your blessings. I have FIVE kids and they've all been puking for TWO weeks and my husband left me and I'm going to lose the house...."
Re the blogging, my "regular" blog is an "everything" kind of blog, so I do post goofy photos and parenting worries there, as well as meatier fare. I posted this topic here because I have one particular friend in mind -- who reads my regular blog but not this one! ;-)
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