New Fathers, Round III

One of the things I’ve noticed is that being parents of a two-year-old is a lot like being the most powerful nation in the world trying to control an occupied foreign land. On the face of it, it seems like we have all the power and should be able to tame this child and mold him in our image. To dictate his constitution as it were. But there’s the language problem. And even when both of us are home, there aren’t enough boots on the ground. He gets most of his information from a kids’ version of Al Jazeera known as the Disney Channel. Plus, the little insurgent has learned very quickly that there are certain lines we just won’t cross and so he’s pretty much not afraid of us. He knows that he can scream longer and louder than the folks back home will tolerate. And he takes an unreasonable all-or-nothing stance when it comes to negotiations: If the insurgent wants a banana, a perfectly logical explanation for why he cannot have one, like “Those bananas aren’t ripe,” is insufficient. He sees bananas and demands that the corrupt interim government distribute them at once.

Apparently, men have all kinds of thoughts and feelings about parenthood and can even be quite funny and insightful about expressing them, too. Who knew?