My Brilliant Career
Rian is due to wake up any second now but thought I should un-bury the ghost of my careers-past, those that have never seen the light of day on a resume:
- Babysitter
- Samosa maker
- Coffee barrista - until I got sacked for the 1st time
- Cleaner - now I always tip the cleaners at hotels, glad I 'moved on'
- Laundromat attendant - terrible terrible job, having to do other peoples laundry
- Chef at a gay-lesbian cafe - I totally made up a resume for this but was really broke.
- Coffee barrista - 2nd time got fired
- Hostess at a massage parlour - 'spa' as I like to call it now but I got lots of tips!
- Hotel receptionist at a gay hotel - one of the rooms was called the 'dungeon', need I say more
- Telemarketer for Concordia U - sadly, I was really good at it and won all the nightly incentive prizes
- Shop clerk in a ugly sweater store
Wow, colourful, eh? And that doesn't even have my professional jobs working at the UN, with HIV+ pregnant women, fair trade, development in E. Africa and now infectious diseases.
Kris
- Babysitter
- Samosa maker
- Coffee barrista - until I got sacked for the 1st time
- Cleaner - now I always tip the cleaners at hotels, glad I 'moved on'
- Laundromat attendant - terrible terrible job, having to do other peoples laundry
- Chef at a gay-lesbian cafe - I totally made up a resume for this but was really broke.
- Coffee barrista - 2nd time got fired
- Hostess at a massage parlour - 'spa' as I like to call it now but I got lots of tips!
- Hotel receptionist at a gay hotel - one of the rooms was called the 'dungeon', need I say more
- Telemarketer for Concordia U - sadly, I was really good at it and won all the nightly incentive prizes
- Shop clerk in a ugly sweater store
Wow, colourful, eh? And that doesn't even have my professional jobs working at the UN, with HIV+ pregnant women, fair trade, development in E. Africa and now infectious diseases.
Kris
posted by Cataclysm @ 5:27 PM
4 Comments:
At 5:50 PM,
Melissa said…
love it. i must know, why were you fired from both of your barista positions??..do tell.
and where on earth were you employed as a samosa maker?? i can not picture that at all!!
At 8:00 PM,
Anne-Marie said…
I too, was fired from a Barista position. Funny though, when I was hired I didn't drink coffee - actually hated it! Had to lie when I was interviewed and all thru training. "Yum, yes, I can definitely taste the chocolate and what a fantastic aroma!". Luckily, God invented lattes.
At 8:12 PM,
landismom said…
Oh god, I once worked the coffee counter at a ridiculously upscale supermarket, and I wanted to FLAY the customers almost. every. day.
My best job-not-on-a-resume, though, was doing set-up for Cirque du Soleil.
At 8:44 PM,
Cataclysm said…
And maybe I want to open a cafe just to be able to sack all of my employees?!! The revenge of the brutal barrista!
I was actually fired for all the wrong reasons... the first time was devastating as I was only 17 and falsely accused of stealing. But the 2nd time, man, I was a terrible employee. It was at the Gourmet Garage in SoHo and wow, I ate really well unofficially! We were supposed to throw out any un-sold $5-$6 bread but would put it in clean garbage bags out near the rest of the trash - I then played Santa as was swarmed when I got back to Harlem handing out loaves. But I was sacked for being late as they were trying to trim staff after the Xmas rush. The neighbourhood & my roomates grieved!
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